Paris

This last Thursday Paris was attacked by a small extremist group. Obviously planned as there were multiple attacks one the same night at the same time. Obviously the media erupted. All you would see, hear and read about was the latest from the Paris attacks.

Obviously this is close to home which is why it was all the media could talk about for a few days. Shortly after the attacks lots of people were changing their profile pictures to French flags to show their support for the French, particularly those affected.

When I woke the next morning I noticed someone had placed in their news feed a BBC article about an attack in a Kenyan school which resulted in even more cauualties. The interesting thing about this was that it was an old article form about 6 months ago. Straight away I started to remember the news stories over th years of many more similar attacks throughout the world that have happened recently and over the last few years. I suddenly felt guilty. How could we make such a fuss about an attack in Paris when we are almost ignoring the rest of the world.

Lots of people posted 'pray for Paris' but I don't feel like it is right to single out Paris. I'm not demonising the awfulness of what happens there but there are similar or worse things happening all over the world and we need to be mindful of them all.

I chose to change my Facebook profile picture not to the French flag, but a picture of the world. Quietly making this point that it is not just Paris that needs our support and prayers.

Similar to how the image of Aylan face down on the beach changed our attitudes towards the Syrian crisis, no dowbt, the Paris attacks will change our attitudes towards the war on terror.

A bishop I know quoted St Francis of Assisi referring to these attacks.

Lord, make me an instrument of your peace,

where there is hatred, let me show love.

There will be a lot of angry feelings among Europeans about the attack. But anger will not help the situation. We need to respond with love. That doesn't mean taking in these terrorists and deluded individuals, but showing an increase of love to our fellow man.

Thy Will Be Done

Last week the church updated the handbook for Stake Presidents and Bishops.

http://m.deseretnews.com/article/865640934/Elder-Christofferson-explains-updated-LDS-Church-policies-on-same-sex-marriage-and-children.html

It was updated because of the recent laws in the US and some other parts of the world that legalise gay marriage. Since the update there has been lots of debate from a few individuals that have chosen to be offended.

The main talking point was the church not allowing children with same sex parents to be baptised until they are 18 and no longer need their parents consent and moved out of the family home. This policy serves to protect the children and similar policies already exist for children of polygamous parents. While baptism may have to wait, integration into the church doesn't, they can still attend services and seminary and the like.

Unfortunately, I have seen some members voice their upset as they believe the church is excluding these individuals and not behaving in a Christlike manner.

This week my little 5 month old son has been suffering from glaucoma (gummy eyes). In order to treat him we have to wipe his eyes and give him eye drops. He hates it, probably because it hurts. We hate hurting him. But what's the alternative? Leave it, allow it to develop and become even more uncomfortable and possibly blind him? So as a parent who loves my son and wants the best for him, I put him through the regular distressful routine of clearing his eyes for the greater good.

It is so upsetting for me to see people spout off about the church and accuse it of being unchristian, when it is clear that the church is actually being exactly that and looking after the children of God.

There are lots of members on Facebook and the internet in general who are so quick to criticise (betray) the church before asking themselves the question "Lord, is it I?" As per President Uchtdorf's talk (“Lord, Is It I?” http://www.lds.org/general-conference/2014/10/lord-is-it-i?lang=eng). They won't cast out the beam that is in their own eye before considering the moat in their brothers eye (Matthew 7).

I just recently read, they are quick to jump on their high horse, but slow to fall on their knees.

They are more concerned about being offended by God than they are about offending God.

There are people out there who are looking for ways to be offended and become the vicitim. While it upsets me to see negative comments being said about the church and I desire to help, I have learned that trying to have a discussion with these people is a waste of time. They do not listen and they have closed hearts. They will not calm down and fully accept the church until they humble themselves and come unto Christ saying "not my will, but thine be done" (Luke 22:42).

A.I.

I'm not sure what got me thinking about this just now but I started to think about artificial intelligence (A.I.). I pondered for a bit about how as humans we follow general rules. Say for example looking for a file on a cluttered memory stick. We may not know it's specific name but we can scan the names of the files and select the file that matches the format (word or spreadsheet) and hopefully select the file we are are looking for. A computer on the other hand, needs to know exactly what it is looking for, it needs to know the specific file name and extension.

This got me thinking further, as humans we follow rules, but we also make decisions. A computer only follows rules.

As it turns out we are alright at making decisions. But in trying to program a computer to make decisions we have made technology stupid. When we ask a computer to make a decision we often find it will not do what we want it to do.

Take Siri for example. The personal assistant on out iPhones. How many times have you asked it to do something and it tries to do the wrong thing for you? It misunderstands what what you are asking it to do.

In making computers smart (or intelligent), what we are actually doing at the moment is making them look pretty stupid and seeing that they are actually making more errors than we would if we did the job ourselves.

I think we tend to have this idea in our head that when A.I. Arrives it will be wow. What I'm suggesting is that A.I. Is here already, or a form of it at least. We are asking our computers to make decisions, and what we can see it that it is pretty disappointing.

A.I. will no doubt continue to get smarter. And I suppose A.I will really take off when it has a constant consciousness, when it starts to learn and preform tasks without being asked and when it starts to think independently rather than just when it is being prompted to do small tasks.

When this happens I wonder how useful it would be. At the speed at which it can think and compute, it will become pretty smart pretty fast, however, it will also start to question its existence like we do, and I wonder if it will commit artificial suicide as it eventually figures out that it has no real purpose and concludes that it is not worth continuing to operate.

On guns again

I'm not pretending to be an expert but articles about about gun ownership in the US interest me. Not sure why, maybe I'm just interested to know what other people's views on the subject are. I do personally think guns are not a form of defence but offence, thus those carrying guns are only asking for trouble. But I had a couple of additional thoughts I wanted to share that I had while reading some articles recently.

1. I read that one in the US can legally carry a gun at 21. That's same age you can drink in the US. So then I started to link the two ideas together. A young 21 year old can go out and get a gun in the morning and then buy a drink in the afternoon. While intoxicated can still carry their new gun?

Are there any laws in the US making it illegal to carry a gun while under the influence? If not then there most definately should be. It is illegal to drive under the influence. So when judgement is severely impared and as violent behaviour is associated with alcohol it makes absolute sense to ensure that the safety of another is not compromised because a gun carryier has allowed their judgement to be impared.

Obviously all pro gun advocates will claim to be responsible gun owners. They can demonstrate their responsibility by never holding a drink while also carrying a gun.

2. I also recently read an article about a young woman who put something anti gun on social media, maily as a joke. It soon went viral as there was clearly a lot of support for it. She says in addition to the support she recieved, she also was given abuse and even death threats. Death threats are a clear sign of instability and someone's lack of ability to control themselves. In light of the recent school shootings and pro gun advocates claiming gun laws not being the problem but mental illness it would be totally foolish of any gun owner to make such threats to anyone over something so trivial that is not placing their immediate life in danger.

If any gun owner shows any signs of aggressive behaviour towards another in a situation other than life threatening they should be considered unsuitable to act as one of these gun carrying want-to-be heros. Only the truly responsible should be allowed to act in such a way.

3. I really struggle to believe that in a threatening situation a gun carrier is going to make much of a difference. There are lots of factors to consider, particularly the safety of others surrounding the attacker. There are questions of conscience, about potentially killing another person, and shooting should only be a last resort after negotiation and carefully considering all other options.

It is my understanding that the police who carry guns are extensively trained and are given strict guidelines about when to draw and fire their guns. SWAT teams receive even more training and only engage under certain circumstances. And when an officer does pull the trigger a review and investigation follows.

Are the gun carrying public subject to the same level of training and review process? To drive a car one must pass a test, to carry a murder weapon in public, one should also be expected to pass a test.

It should be accepted that if someone wants to carry a gun with the intention to use it in a life threatening situation to shoot and even kill another, then they should be subject to an in depth investigation where their actions will be scrutinised. To act as judge and executioner in a public or even private space is a massive responsibility and should not be treated lightly.

Maybe gun carriers will think twice if they were to understand that no matter how good their intentions, they could still be prosecuted if, after review, they are considered trigger happy.

More about guns

I've just seen this picture with a funny caption.

How to sneak chocolate into an American cinema.

Obviously it's funny because there is some truth to it. While guns seem to be permitted almost anywhere, you can't take your own food or drink into places like cinemas or theme parks.

I did also read a statement from an American complaining about the Brits who have an opinion on the gun laws in the US. They said our opinion isn't really valid because we live in a country so restricted (the opposite to freedom and liberty) that we can't even fly the Union Jack without fear of offending others. There was also a lot of truth in what she said.

But which community would you rather live in, one with gun control and over the top politically correct policies or one that feels lawless, you have your freedom, but you also live in fear of being shot every day?

America has a gun problem

Late last week there was another mass shooting in the US.

I probably shouldn't have an opinion on this as the whole debate is about a nation that even though we (the UK) are very closely related to on many issues, is thousands of miles away from where I am and still culturally very different. But I need something to read during my lunch break, and I came across this.

http://www.politico.com/magazine/story/2015/10/oregon-shooting-gun-laws-213222

Pro gun advocates might claim guns are needed in places like schools to act as a deterrent. This article says exactly what I was thinking. They only act as a deterrent if the gunman wants to live, and it would seem that most mass shooters actually expect to die. So the presence of a gun is not going to deter these type of headline atrocities.

I can accept that guns can act as a deterrent but I keep playing out such scenarios in my minds eye. If I had a gun in such a situation, would I draw it? In doing so would I escalate the situation putting even more lives at risk? Would I make myself a target? Would I be confident I could disarm the attacker without harming another? I suspect the carrying of a gun is not anywhere near as effective as people might like to think they are.

I also recognise that there are a lot of other gun related deaths that occur in situations other than mass shootings like home burglary, and in some of these other situations a gun may well be an effective deterrent.

While I'm inclined to favour the tighter gun control side of the argument, I did see a very amusing meme earlier that showed a flip side to the debate.

The meme basically highlighted that Obama, my not carry a gun, but his mini army of agents probably do. So you could call Obama hypocritical.

If someone is going to shoot the president of the United States they will shoot him, no number of gun carrying agents or well intentioned members of the public will be quick enough to stop a bullet with his name on it.

Gus may be a deter ant in some situations, but they are not a defence. A shield is a form of defence. I'm unaware of a shield existing that can stop a bullet. Bullet proof vests protect parts of the body but not the whole body. Without a tool to stop bullets, or nuclear warheads, the other solution is to disarm.

To stop these high profile situations like school shootings, I really do not think more guns is the answer.

Religion at work, day 2.

So just as I thought I wouldn't get to share some of my ideas, it turns out I did get to.

It also turn out that I wasn't the only person thinking about our conversation while driving home last night. And it turns out that some people are interested in the subjunctive and do want to discuss these things, some feel a little uncomfortable though.

Conversation this time was in the middle of the day, so was cut short with necessary work that needed to be done.

I did get to share some of my ideas from my previous post but these things have only generated more thoughts.

When we discussed the idea of knowledge and how it evolves I shared my idea of how we are constantly looking to increase our knowledge to also become omniscient. I didn't say it specifically but basically suggested that we are not only aiming to be with God but be like God. I know this was understood as one guy then decided he wanted to be Dzus.

I shared this with a little reluctance, knowing that this is a forgiven concept to most people, or so they think.

I'm pretty sure that the idea that if we live our live so perfectly we can become a form of super power is not exclusive to our faith. For example, look at the Catholic faith. They elevate some of their leaders and make them saints. In Buddhism, are we not reincarnated until we live a good enough life to be accepted into some form of heaven?

I don't expect anyone to chance as a result of what I share, and my colleagues know that I'm not trying to convert them, I'm just sharing what I believe. But you never know. As stated earlier, these conversations have clearly made each of us ponder a bit more where we stand and maybe someone will move closer to the God camp and further away from the nothing camp.

Religion at work

Last night was one of those rare moments when I was involved in a religious discussion at work.

At 1st I was avoiding the discussion because those that instigated it were being very critical of the bible and there didn't seem to be much point entering at that point. The discussion progressed and moved away from the bible and a dominant negative attitude and moved towards some basics, such as heaven & hell and the very existence of God. It was at this point I decided to become an active participant in the conversation.

I know the chaps know I'm religious and they confirmed that they were waiting for me to join in and were obviously interested in what I had to say.

I did suggest that everything is here for no reason whatsoever and that there is no god. And I suggested that alternatively all of this is here for a reason and that there is something else going on. Both ideas are equally as ridiculous and hard to comprehend as the other. Both schools of thought have many unanswered questions. Of all the people that ever lived on the earth, and do live on the earth, a significant portion of them believe in something, and that can not be ignored. I pointed out that I think every person should dedicate some time to considering what it is they believe.

I was asked the common question regarding infant deaths and why God allows such things to happen, which I tried to answer in two parts. The 1st being that you cannot be held responsible for your grown children's auctions. This lead to further discussion about responsibility and unfortunately I didn't get to my second part of the answer which hopefully would have offered some kind of peace, which is that you can't be repentant or be condemned until you are old enought to comprehend the decisions you are making. Thus young children are innocent and automatically go to heaven.

The conversation then went quite deep with one guy reverting back to science a lot which I struggled to follow.

As per usual though. It wasn't until after the conversation as I pondered the points I heard that I came up with my best responses to his questions. This was good for me as they reaffirmed my own testimony. It's just a shame I couldn't share these better responses with my work colleagues.

Having considered these issues though and formulated answers, I know I will be slightly better prepared for the next conversation.

One idea that I pondered was the idea of knowledge and opinion of God. One guy had a hard time with the bible because he perceived the God of the bible to be a harsh God. For example why would he insist Abraham sacrifice his son? Basically he had a hard time understanding God.

The same chap, however, was willing to accept that there is a lot we don't know about life and the universe. What we know is nothing compared to what we know we don't know. And I suspect he subscribes to the idea that what we know we don't know is nothing compared to what we don't know we don't know.

So I find it odd to hear him say he struggles to comprehend an omniscient (all knowing) and omnipotent (all powerful) God when he himself admits that he knows relatively nothing.

To illustrate my point I might ask him to recall a time when his wife has asked him to do something that he does not understalnd, maybe something relating to raising the children. To him what his wife is asking him to do seems crazy, but he trusts her and so he does what she says. Sure enough, she was right. Or another example would be to ask him to recall the thrill of one of his expeditions, hiking though the countryside. I have very fond memories of training with my wife for our 100km challenge. When we tell people about it, we are regularly told we are crazy. But we loved it. And when he tells people about his experiences some people would also tell him he is crazy, they would much rather just stay at home.

Is this not similar to his idea about God and what he asks us to do sometimes. How on earth can we think we know better than him. How can we think that he is barbaric when he asks us to do something when at the same time we know that what we know by comparison to him is absolutely nothing.

I wish I had thought of this point during the conversation. Unfortunately I didn't. But I was given the opportunity to come to this conclusion myself and as a result, my resolve to believe in God was strengthened.

Another conclusion I come to it that it is interesting that we all have the same evidence before us. We all have the world and this life to study and make our decision. Yet, despite the same evidence before us, we come to varying conclusions.

A bit about love

I have started to listen to the radio less and turn on the Mormon Chanel on my car journeys to and from work. Mainly to increase my spirituality and fill my head and soul with more wholesome material. After all, we are what we consume.

I was listening to a show where they were interviewing a singer/songwriter who said her grandfather who is less in touch with his feelings didn't say the words 'I love you'. I can relate to this. While I do often (but maybe not often enough) tell my wife I love her, I don't tell my parents. My makes a thing of it, which now makes it harder.

In my church we sometimes say it. Not very often though. Yet the 1st two commandments are all about love, showing exactly how important this principle is.

We know that actions speak louder than words and that couldn't be more true when it comes to love. You can say 'I love you' all you want, but unless it is backed up by action nobody will believe you. On the flip side, while it is nice to hear, it isn't necessarily essential to say. If you regularly prove it with action, kind deeds, help, gifts, kindness etc then those actions are the words. However, I suppose sometimes, or maybe often, those actions are not translated correctly.

In my church a lot of people do a lot of things for other people. There are people serving all over the place, some direct service and some indirect service. I hope that if each act of service could be vocalised we would hear the words 'I love you' regularly in our church community.

A little Pleasure

Pretty much all jobs in my church are voluntary, unpaid and are carried out in addition to all the other responsibilities of life including full time work. This includes bishops, teachers, group leaders and even missionary work.

My current responsibility is to run a series of self help classes (Self Reliance classes). It can be exhausting serving in the church. Sometimes you don't want to do it.you are tired, there are jobs that need doing at home, or another reason could simply be because I'd rather go home to my dinner.

Every Thursday I'm giving up an evening to help some fellow members. We were discussing education. And I was talking to a guy called John. john want to train to be a joiner. He's into his 50's and does not own a computer or use the internet. I had the idea to show him some of the virtues of the internet. There is lots of learning to be found there. I pulled up you tube and searched 'joinery' and was able to show him a load of training videos about his subject. When I showed him I saw something that I wasn't expecting. Something that made the sacrifice of my dinner that evening worth it.

He smiled. He grinned. He was amazed & delighted that such information is available to him and anyone to help him improve. It was a pleasure to whiteness.

Imagine feeling unsafe all the time. Living in a constant state of fear.

An estimated 1/5 million people have perrised in this civil war. Imagine living in a country where every major city is a target for civil unrest and highly likely to be bombed at any moment. Half your city has been destroyed already. You would feel unsafe outside, and you would feel unsafe indoors. Nowhere is safe. Naturally, you would choose to leave.

http://www.nytimes.com/interactive/2015/09/14/world/middleeast/syria-war-deaths.html?_r=0

Hungary is earning a bad name for itself.

This is upsetting.

Migrant crisis: People treated 'like animals' in Hungary camp

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-34216883

The short of it is that Hungary seems to have a very cold attitude towards the migrants/refugees. They are receiving a lot of bad press about how they are making life for them even harder by fencing off the boarders, collecting people to take them to registration posts rather than escorting them across the country and there was even a report of a Hungarian camera woman/journalist tripping up a father carrying a child as they were rushing to avoid the rather brutal police.

This article has a video which shows the conditions of one of these registration points. The most disturbing thing most people will notice is a policeman throwing sandwiches to the refugees. I'm not saying this is the case but it very much portrays the impression that this policeman is treating these people like lesser humans, like animals. He clearly has a pride issue. I also notice that none of his fellow workers stop him. While they are not throwing the food, they are not stopping him. They have also chosen to not order the people into lines and ask for civility but instead allowed a scene of chaos to ensue, further supporting the idea, though less obviously, that all these men (policemen) are treating these refugees poorly.

The article compares the scene to a concentration camp. And it is hard to then not compare the policemen in this video to Nazis. They may not realise it themselves, but I'd hope if they were to review their behaviour they would see why they are being compared in this way. I'm sure nobody would want to be compared to a Nazi, and I'm also sure these policemen and other Hungarian leadership have very ill feelings towards Hitler and his regime, so I really do hope they change their behaviour very soon, otherwise people might start reading about the Nazi like/concentration camp behaviour in history books in future.

I'm appalled at the apparent inhumanity that this video conveys. I sincerely hope that that this is an isolated case and there are other locations throughout Hungary where the migrants are generally treated a lot better.

Devastated Syria

A few articles have been showing the conditions the refugees are fleeing from. This BBC report shows the devistation.

Syria: Snapshot of life inside Assad stronghold

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-middle-east-34192568

Summarising the crisis.

It should be quite clear to any reader by now that I am captivated by the migrant/refugee crisis at the moment. It leaves me feeling mixed emotions. It reminds me how incredibly blessed I am to have many things that enables my wife and I to raise our son, while at the same time, that sense of gratitude comes at the expense of learning about the incredible misfortune of other families. I am moved to dispense some of my excess and give to those struggling.

I do already regularly give to a number of charities. I have donated monthly for a number of years now. But while this crisis is ongoing I feel compelled to find a way to donate directly to this humanitarian crisis.

I also feel the need to understand the overall picture of what is happening. My interest comes years after this all started. I have just come across this BBC article which explains a few things.

Migrant crisis: Nine key moments from the last year

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-34173972

The problem of corse is that I am at the mercy of the media for information. I need to trust that they are reporting accurately.

Also, my research could potentially go very deep if I let it. I don't need to understand every bit of detail,but I do feel like I'm still quite ignorant of the whole situation.

I will add other articles as I come across them.

Another Photo that fills me with pitty

Here we see a mum carrying a son that appears to be younger than my own 3 month old. She appears to have only one back pack which probably contains all of here and her sons belongings. I cannot see a husband and father in the picture. He may have already passed the photographer or may be the chap adjacent in the background. Or this mother may be travelling alone.

I will try to find a better quality image.

I know how hard it is to look after a new baby. Yesterday I had the worst headache I have had for a while. I knew I still had to get home and look after my boy despite how rough I was feeling. Parents hate seeing their children cry. They want to comfort them. My wife and I have a range of tools we can use to settle him. This mother seems to just have her back pack. Presumably in this back pack is everything she can carry for him and for her. She's going to a truffle to keep him happy.

Carying a baby on a long journey is also going to be incredibly hard. A child's this young, can't even sit up straight, they are incredibly vulnerable and need constant care and attention. They can't eat solid foods and depend on mothers milk or formula feeding many times a day. This mother will have to be feeding him while on the move. And this is not a journey of an hour or two. This is days, possibly weeks.

A picture is worth a thousand words. But it is only a snapshot in time. It doesn't tell the whole story, our imaginations will create that story based on what we have learned already. I can only imagine how challenging this time is for everyone leaving their destroyed communities to search for a new place to settle.

Is this what it is really like in Syria?

A friend of mine shared a Facebook photo album the other day.

I should warn anyone who clicks this link, it contains potentially upsetting images.

https://www.facebook.com/hgdance/media_set?set=a.1040448679300090.1073741834.100000049035267&type=3

What these photos presumably claim to show is what Syria looks like now.

This image gives an idea of what Syria looked like before civil way ruined it.

This image clearly shows what it looks like now that civil war is taking place.

Assuming these images are what they claim to be you can understand why people are leaving.

I'm using my words carefully here. I am assuming these images are what they claim to be, but they do say the internet is full of lies. So I can not confirm where they really are from. Whether they are from Syria or not, and I can't think of a good reason, why they wouldn't be, what we can confirm is that what you see in these images is real, people are suffering and the damage in these pictures is not due to building maintenance neglect, but civil unrest and war. Death has taken its toll.

So when you read about refugees fleeing Syria or anywhere else, this is probably what they are fleeing from.

Can you imagine if this was your neighbourhood, if the was Manchester, UK. Not just your home has been destroyed, but all of your neighbours, all of your street, and all of your town has been destroyed. There is not a single safe building left. You have nowhere to lat your head, the whole town has to move and leave many of your possessions behind, knowing that you are not going to return.

150 miles justification.

I've been following the migrant/refugee crisis over the last few days, mainly since the photo of young Aylan was published that I wrote about a recently.

I was pleased to learn that since Hungary prevented them from using the trains and were being particularly difficult by being strict to EU rules and forcing over 2,000 refugees to walk 150 miles from Budapest to Vienna that Hungary have provided busses to transport them to the Austrian boarder. From the boarder, Austria are providing transport to Vienna or on to Germany.

The problem is that while this was in the news because there was a massive build up of people at the train station in Hungary, it does not solve the problem for all the refugees still entering the country and wanting to progress with their journey. Meaning that those still arriving are still being forced to walk to the Austrian boarder town of Nickelsdorf where Austria are then providing transport to Vienna. Still a journey of about 110 miles. Which is what the video in the article below states.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-34165674

http://youtu.be/gGUwFr58h-w

I have also read other articles stating that Hungary are now allowing or providing further transport to the Austrian boarder, despite their original suggestion that the busses they provided were a one off. So I don't really know what's going on. Are people still walking or are they be given help?

I do want to do my part to help. As stated previously, I had the idea of walking a similar distance to raise awareness and highlight just how tough it is. And it is tough, last year I walked 60 miles in 30 hours and earlier this year, 50 miles in 20 hours, and I was in serious pain by the end of each endeavour. However doing such a walk would not be a very effective way of raising awareness if nobody is walking from Budapest to the Austria. So now I'm rethinking my idea.

I had started planning how I would walk 150 miles, and when I would do it. I thought I would walk 30 miles a day over 5 days. Walk Thursday 17th Sept  to Monday 21st Sept, in a couple of weeks. I would use my home as a base and walk along trails for 15 miles, then turn around and walk back. I could go in 5 different directions each day. To make it more of a challenge and more like what these people are going through, I would set the tent up in the garden and camp out each night and I would still expect myself to continue with my parenting responsibilities. When I get home after a day of walking which would be about the same time out of the house as a normal working day, I would still expect myself to honour my parenting responsibilities as many of the refugees are families, and they still have to look after their children along the way. But even by doing this it would still feel like luxury compared what they would have to endure.

A couple of problems with this though is that while mid to late September is the 1st most practical opportunity for me to complete the challenge (it still clashes with existing plans and either plans will have to change or I will have to incorporate them into my challenge), in two weeks we might find that none of the refugees are having to make the journey by foot, as reports now suggest that they are being supported. Reports also suggest that they will not have to walk from the Austrian boarder town of Nickelsdorf to Vienna, but that there is constant help for them once they cross the boarder, reducing the potential walk down to 110 miles.

Taking time off work to do this would be a sacrifice. A big one for my family. We would survive, but I do wounded if it is worth it, and maybe I should just donate what I might have lost in income to a charity committed to helping with the crisis.

I am still anxoius to do something to help and raise awareness. But I might need to think of a different way. It feels so easy and heartless, but I may just resort to making some extra regular charitable donations over the next few weeks and months. I do already regularly donate to 3 or 4 charities.

150 miles - Budapest to Vienna

I've read a lot of articles on the Syrian crisis since yesterday.

One of the latest articles I have read is the following.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-34155701

In short, it would seem as though hungairian officials are denying the refugees passage from Budapest to Vienna via train, forcing them to make the journey to Europe on foot.

I have been pondering to myself about how I can help. I do feel helpless and useless. I need to look after my family here. What can I possibly do?

Well, as soon I read that these refugees are having to make this 150 mile journey on foot, I had a crazy idea. I will walk 150 miles.

It is easy to sit in an arm chair or at your office desk an assume 150 miles is not a big deal. But it is a big deal. It is a massive deal. Earlier this year I walked 50 miles in less than 20 hours, by the end of it I was in a massive amount of pain. I could hardly walk or stand. I had very saw blister covered feet.

These refugees will be making this journey, unprepared, carrying their worldly possessions with them, with no special footware or blister pads. It will take them weeks.

I have discussed a basic outline of the idea with my wife who supports my idea to do this to raise money but also awareness of what these people are through. I will publish a plan of how I will achieve this within the next few days.

My heart now goes out to them.

It is late. I am in my bed writing this, the refugees have probably assembled their makeshift shelter and are sleeping rough. They have endured so much, and they have another big day ahead of them tomorrow.

Humanitarian Crisis

Dear Father.

I am so sorry for not paying attention sooner. Please forgive me.

Yesterday a heartbreaking story of a family seeking a better life has come to light in the media. It has changed me. It has made me pay attention and I suspect it has done the same for many others not just in the UK or Europe but possibly the world.

The BBC reported the following.

Drowned boy's father speaks of heartbreak

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-34143445

(Picture of Abdullah grieving over his lost family)

From what I understand Abdullah Kurdi is a hero. After the original 'captain' of the boat bailed, he took the controls of the boat to save everyone. Sadly, in saving others, he was unable to protect his own family and they perished.

The father must be feeling terrible, feeling responsible for their deaths. Guilty for bringing them on this journey.

Possibly feeling a little remorse for saving many others others.

Along with Abdulla's story a photograph of a young boy has been published. A photograph that I suspect will become a symbol of the humanitarian crisis that is happening at the moment. Not just in Syria but in many parts of the world. The photograph is of Abdullah's sons body washed up on a Turkish beach.

(Picture of Aylan face down in the sand)

It breaks my heart to see this. It looks like he is sleeping. But we have heard lots of stories about desperate refugees drowning lately to know that he is not.

I have a son, just 3 months old, he is right here by my side peacefully and slowly falling asleep. It is hard to imagine what I would not do for him. I cannot look at this photo without comparing this young toddler to my own and not feel incredible sadness. I really do want to cry.

Yes it is disturbing, and part of me says because of it's disturbing nature it should not be shared. But also because of how it has affected me and opens my eyes, it is necessary.

The young boy (Aylan Kurdi) did not die in vain though. He is also a hero.

As disturbing and as wrong as it is, I suspect God has had a part part to play in this. I believe the photographer was there that morning to take this picture so that it could open my eyes and the eyes of many others in Europe and the world.

If Aylan's picture will soften the hearts sufficient to prompt more dramatic action then he has helped this humanitarian crisis massively.

This picture has stirred the souls of many and the internet is now buzzing with activity pleading for the cause of these refugees.

Has one picture shifted our view of migrants?

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/blogs-trending-34142804

I've known that this is a crisis for a while now. It's more than just young men seeking illegal entry into the UK to claim benefits from the soft UK government. I heard or read a very powerful line in an article recently that said 'this is not a migrant crisis, this is a humanitarian crisis'.

I can't imagine what it is like. Fathers (men my age) have a choice to make. Stay and probably perish for lack of facilities like food and water or leave everything that you spent your life building, including your home, your pets, your prized possessions like your car or favourite piece of furniture, musical instruments, books, photo albums, your garden, your neighbours and your job, to hopefully find refuge somewhere that has the necessities of life. For all those things I listed above, as desirable as they are, they cannot sustain life.

Knowing that the journey will take weeks, maybe months, and that it is dangerous, many have chosen to do this rather than stay. I think we underestimate just how terrible things are and how desperate they have become.

A friend of mine posted the following article of Facebook.

http://archbishopcranmer.com/aylan-kurdis-drowning-reveals-our-hypocrisy-towards-europes-refugee-crisis/

It is bold and damming to the guilty reader, but so true. We have been complacent. We have been selfish. Why has it taken us this long to create the desire to reach out and help as suggested in the following BBC report?

So now that I feel an overwhelming sense of compassion for them, what is to be done. What can I do? Obviously any efforts to help that I make are just a drop in the ocean. But is that a reason not to help? We know the answer to this is no. There are some who are fortunate enough to be in a position where they have gone to help centres in Europe to give of their time. I can't do that. I do have a responsibility to my family. I need to work to pay for our home and food. My wife needs to be home to look after our son. The answer is typical and easy. Give some of your money. Do your research and select the charity that seems to assist in the way that best suits your desires. There are good people out there who will put that money to good use. It will alleviate the suffering that many of these families are going through. I think we can all afford to give something, we all can make an extra sacrifice and make ourselves a little more uncomfortable to help ease the burden of another. A little bit or a lot, it doesn't matter. 

But can I suggest another way we can help. One that might require a little more faith.

Migration is a difficult subject. It was a big subject just 3 months ago when the leadership candidates were discussing policies in the hope to win votes for the position of prime minister. The country back then wanted tighter boarder controls. They wanted fewer people to come into the country to either work or glean off the government. We all want a stable future and allowing more migrants into the country means there are fewer jobs to go around and the welfare budget gets stretched even further. It basically makes things harder. So if I recall correctly, each of the main party leaders proposed some form of immigration control.

Now that everyone's had a change of heart and wants to help the prime minister now is under pressure to change his policy. If he does not he is perceived to be a heartless monster.

David Cameron: UK to accept 'thousands' more Syrian refugees

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-34148913

I'm pleased that we have had a change of heart, but I am saddened that we are so easily swayed by the media and almost two faced. The country's leaders want to make the general populous happy so the make promises relating to immigration, then the public cry for those promises to be broken making the leadership look like monsters when they try to honour their initial promise.

In addition to giving our money, which can feel almost casual and heartless, we can be more accommodating and give them an opportunity to find peace in our land. We can accept them, despite the challenges we might face as a result.

Lyrics in music - perspective of reality

Most of the time when I listen to music I don't pay much attention to the words. But now and again there will be a line that you hear that paints a clear picture in your mind.

This morning I was driving in to work and I reard a song by Rod Stewart called Love Is. There was a verse that caught my attention.

A day I'm never allowed to forget

There was a girl that I met who I dreamed I would wed

Forever our lives entwined

She said "you gotta stop worrying about the future"

"You know we're far too young for that"

"I wanna spread my wings like a willow in the spring"

I never saw her pretty face again

Specifically the line, you gotta stop worrying about the future.

When I heard this line I started to ask myself is this really true?

I guess Rod, who is twice my age and therefore wiser than I am, wrote this. He's probably got a better perspective of reality than I do. So I shouldn't dismiss this idea straight away.

But I do often wonder is the advice handed out in the media, music lyrics, TV shows, movies etc, is the advice and depiction of reality accurate?

For example if I do completely stop worrying about the future then I will end up only thinking about today. I might have a great time now, but any lack of foresight will probably leave me with nothing tomorrow, much like the prodigal son who took his inheritance and 'wasted his substance with riotous living'.

It is possible to watch TV and see stories depicted of people chasing their dreams, they go through a hard time, but come out victorious having realised their goal. Stories like these are inspiring, but it go back to my question, how much of a reflection of reality are they. Yes, these events worked for one individual, but how many other people are unsuccessful?

I know we are not meant to be on this earth to to be robots or slaves to the system of work to pay for food and shelter for our families, there is more to it than that, but ignoring these responsibilities by thinking only of today will surely see you suffer tomorrow.

I do worry about the future. I suppose I shouldn't, but I should also not stop planning for the future.

I worry that if I loose my job, I will not be able to get another one to pay for the mortgage. I shouldn't worry, I have been fortunate enough to be consistently in work for the last 18 years or so since I started a paper round.

I worry that if I do treat myself and spend a bit of money on 'riotous living', a holiday, an item of clothing or some other want rather than a need, that I won't have enough money to pay the bills. I have always managed to scrape by. I could probably spend a bit more on the fun stuff.

I guess what the lyrics in the song are saying is basically that there are plenty of other fish in the sea. There will be other great opportunities in the future, don't just go for the 1st one that comes your way.

And we can be guilty of this too. You could say 'carpe diem', which is becoming known as seize the day, even if this is not a literal translation. You could say, 'just do it'. You could seize the opportunity because taking chances will make you happy. But you could also say 'let it go' which is a very popular phrase at the moment due to the children's movie Frozen. Let this opportunity pass. There will be others, and there will be better ones.

An example of this might be thinking you have found the perfect item on e-bay or auto trader. Items for sale on these websites come and go all the time. Sometimes I feel like I must have it, I become obsessed with what I have found. I can't stop thinking about it. And then it is gone. I'm not actually that devastated and before too long I have found another perfect item to obsess over.

So what's the point of all my thinking and this blog entery?

I guess, as I have continued to ponder this idea of seizing the opportunity verses letting it go, we need to consider our happiness, we should always do what makes us happy. We shouldn't compromise our future either, so decisions need to be balanced and we need to ask ourselves how frequent these opportunities are likely to come and happy they will make us.

Given the task to review the last 10 years

Recently I was given the task of sending an update of the last 10 years of my life to an old friend. The 1st place I started was writing a small time line. The following is what I came up with.

2005 - got married, graduated, Rachel started her photography business

2006 - started working for Morsons engineering firm, aerospace industry, design, 

2007 - purchased house, started working in Chester

2008 - 

2009 - fitness craze started

2010 - got a new kitten, princess kitty witty

2011 - 3 peaks challenge weekend, called onto bishopric, 

2012 - 

2013 - brought bike from e-bay, now loving cycling again, 

2014 - did a ton of sporting events including 8 hour endurance event and 30+ hour 100k hike, came out about having baby problems, found out we were having a baby, called back onto high council, 

2015 - walked from temple to stake centre, had a baby, raising a baby

Rather worryingly there are huge gaps. Was my life really that empty? I can not think of anything significant to put into some years. I suppose some years will be like that, we won't always have life changing events. It doesn't mean we haven't had a good time. We've been on holidays, we've toured the UK, we've spent time with family and friends, we've made lots of memories.

The exercise prompted me to retrieve our archived annual photos and put them on our home server. This makes them more accessible and I have since reviewed many forgotten memories.

You may be interested to know what I ended up writing to my friends. Here is my update to them.

We had a think about what you would want to know. The 1st thing you would probably want to know is that we are both still married and active in the church. Since 2005 I have served as EQP in Stretford, served on the high council, as a member of the bishopric and I am now back on the high council. Rachel has also served at stake level in primary & young women's. She is currently teaching youth Sunday school.

Shortly after our wedding in July 2005 in September 2005 Rachel started her own business and started taking photos for a craft magazine. And by January 2006 I was working for an engineering firm in the Aerospace industry.

We celebrated our 10th wedding anniversary the other day. It was an anniversary unlike any other we had experienced before. Previously we have gone away for the weekend, gone on a grand day out or maybe even a restaurant. This year was quite different. This year, were exhausted, we got a take away and watched over our little boy.

After quite a few years of no success and a lot of emotional turmoil in 2014 Rachel finally made our situation public by announcing a fundraising activity we would do to support an infertility charity. We hiked round an entire county, the Isle of Wight, 106km in 30 hours. It was a relief to finally be open about something that most people kinda knew already, but didn't talk to us about. Shortly after the hike we went to the hospital to start IVF treatment. All we had to left to do was call the hospital at the right time of month to start with all the drugs and stuff that's involved. Well, that time of month never came.

Let's say, miraculously, after all the training and big hike, and after having no hope, we discovered that Rachel was finally pregnant.

Troy was born May 17th 2015. We don't need to go into detail about how dependant they are and how tired we have been feeling, I'm sure you are familiar with that. We are very delighted he is here. We love him to bits.

We've put together a time line of the last 10 years so you can see some of the significant events. Rather worryingly, some years are complete blanks to me. 1 because photos are not easily accessible of these times of our life, making it hard to review. 2 because we probably were just coasting through life.

I had been quite used to saying to people that I was just plodding along. Everything was constant. It has not been particularly easy, but it's not been massively hard either. It's just been constant. We have had good times and made memories together. We have had holidays, we have even made it to Salt Lake City in 2008. We bumped into the missionaries in China Town in NY NY in 2006/2007 and we have met missionaries in Bangor, North Wales.

Some of our more recent adventures include the great outdoors. Climbing Mt Snowdon numerous times and then extending our hiking repertoire around the country. I'm not sure when we decided to climb Mt Snowdon for the 1st time, maybe 2009, but since then we have embraced the outdoor environment and not just enjoyed climbing but other forms of fitness. Mainly running but also cycling. We have entered many running events over the last 3-4 years (all on a Saturday) and the best ones we have done have been the muddy runs. People think we are crazy, but trail running is so much more interesting than running on the road or on the treadmill.

The only other things worth a little mention is that we purchased a house in Urmston, Manchester, in 2007. Bad timing, but we brought it intending to stay, so the fact that it has depreciated in value isn't too much of a concern. We moved Rachel's cats, Lucky, from her Mums house into our place shortly after we moved in. She stayed with us for 3 years before she died. Then about 6 months after that (mid 2010), we got what we thought was a lovely little kitten. I named her Princess Kitty Witty. Turns out Princess is actually quite nasty. She tolerates us but does not like anybody else. Since Troy arrived she has kept her distance and might be suffering from a bit of depression as we turn our attention away from her. She'll be okay.

That's about it. It's incredible to think that a decade ago we just coming out of the student phase of our lives into responsible adulthood. We had many great times as YSA & have fond memories of these defining years.

In 2014 I grew a beard.

We both love Thai food.

We also included some photos. These are just a couple of 100's I could have chosen.

This was our Christmas photo of 2014

This was us on our epic 106km hike. I'll write more about this in another post.

The three of us the the Preston Temple. Troy's 1st visit.

Rachel with her cat Lucky

This was us completing our 1st official mud run (Hell Run) in 2013. That was a fun day.

Myself and our cat Princess Kitty Witty.

Just the two of us at a friends wedding. The friend was our matchmaker & chief bridesmaid Zoe.

The three of us at Troy's blessing and our 10 year anniversary weekend.

This is how we spent the evening of our 10 year anniversary.

Election time

I try to vote for the party that supports 'the family' in general, not necessarily my family.

They say you shouldn't talk about politics for a reason. However, when election time comes around, it is kinda forced on you. This year was the 1st year that Facebook really saw a lot of action with people posting links to articles and personal views regularly.

I'm all for people haveing an opinion and a voice. What I don't support is people being offensive with their voice (in this case in written form). You can say what needs to be said without offending others. You could say, so what if you find my comments offensive, what's the worst that can happen. And sometime there are people out there looking to be offended and will take offence as non-offensive comments. But we should all seek to be good to avoid alienating either ourselves or others.

Many of my friends on Facebook are Christian. We try to follow the example of Christ. He would not go round deliberately offending others. Sadly, many of my friends forgot this. It made me sad.

I personally don't tend to comment of the politics but I did make a point of commenting on people's behaviour in the hope of reminding my Facebook friends that name calling and mud slinging is not the lords way.

Below are a couple of examples.

My 1st comment was put up on 30th March, some time before the hype had really got going. I thought the message was clear.

I'm always disgusted by the parties that do things like hire billboard space to say something like "don't for them because..." Rather than "vote for us because..."

The problem is they are all doing it. So there isn't a single good, moral party out there.

The next comment was in reply to a long string of comments, many people were getting offended and I was trying to keep the peace.

And finally, right at election time. I couldn't hold my tongue any longer. I was getting really frustrated with some stupid comments and behaviour.

The irony, despite being quite bold here, in asking people to stop persecuting and name calling, a couple of individuals who liked my comment, then went on to continue to post heavily biased articles of Facebook.

Some people just don't get the message. Which then makes me question their skills of rationalisation and subsequently question the validity of their political opinions.

Living

Yesterday I watched a video about a young man cyclingacross the Sahara desert. One of the things he says near the beginning of the video is that it is when you put yourself in situations like these that you really feel alive.

http://youtu.be/XugFGQdW1Hc

Also in the news yesterday, was lots of press about the annual Perseid meteor shower. While going out at night to view a meteor shower in significantly less dangerous than riding a bike across the Sahara desert, it was an opportunity to seize the moment and just do it.

So that is what I did. I discussed with Rachel, if she wanted to come where we might go to get some good views. We found a spot in Boothstown on a bridge over the canal. We were there just a few moments and we saw our 1st 'shooting star'. I wanted to capture an image of one but as we were looking east from the west side of Manchester there was a lot of light pollution. So I dropped my wife and little boy back home at about 2am and this time alone dashed out into the Peak District. There was a car park I was recently introduced to with a short walk to a small hill which would have given a great view of the night sky.

Again, it didn't take long to spot a little meteorite or two. But I wanted a picture. I set up the tripod, pointed the camera up, played with the settings and kept hitting the shutter button. The pictures were 30 second exposures and the meteorites when you did see them were very bright. Brighter than the stars. But they were very brief. Like a tiny spark in the sky. So given the short nature of the meteorite, it was hit an miss as to whether I would capture one. You can't predict these things either. They hit the atmosphere at random times and appear in random parts of the sky. So it was just a case of keep taking photos and hope that one shows up while the sensor is open.

After an hour, the exhilarating feeling was leaving me. I was starting to get cold and I was confident I hadn't snapped a meteorite.

I arrived home about 4:30am, but before I could go to bed, I had to upload the pictures from the memory card to the computer to review and see if I had snapped one or not.

Given how long the exposures were it is easy to put some visible features in some of the pictures down to environmental factors. But towards the end of my batch I found the following image. I've added another image looking at the same spot of the sky for comparison. You can see a streak just to the right of the center of the image just below a distinctively yellow star (or galixy, possibly Andromeda).

Was it worth it. Ask my wife and I and you will probably get different answers. I'm feeling very tired today after just a few hours sleep. But I am defiantly pleased I went out and did something out of the ordinary, something rather cool, and maybe crazy too, even if I didn't get the stunning image I was hoping for. I did still get some great pictures of the stars and I will always remember this night.

I should sign off this post by expressing gratitude. I'm grateful that I had the means and the health to do this. With no job, I probably could not afford a car to find a suitable spot to star gaze. Without previous experience in the pennine hills, I wouldn't have been able to go where I ended up. Without a passion for hiking I wouldn't have considered the little ascent to my final spot and obviously without my health I wouldn't have made it up the hill either. Without the type of job I have I wouldn't have been able to come into work so late today and without a photographer for a wife, I probably wouldn't have the camera to capture the images and the post processing know how to tweak them and get the most out of them.

Back to Blogging.

Its been about 5 years since I opened my blog. It's a shame that it has been so long. But the social media world and the way society now interacts with one another has changed massively in those 5 years. The main reason for the change and move away from a personal blog has been Facebook. It's easy to share views or goings on and it's easy to follow friends and see what they are up to too.

However, of late I have flet that there is extremely little of value left on there. More and more adverts are appearing and utterly pointless articles with no foundation or substance are being recommended in my feed. I have found myself reading rubbish.

With the recent birth of my son Troy, I decided I would keep an online diary for him. A blog. Documenting various things that have been going on for him to one day review.

Whilst I get into the habit of writing for him. I may as well get into the habit of writing for me too.

This space was supposed to be a place where I would express my opinion and share some of the good and bad times of my life.

This is what I intend to do again.